HOW TO NEGOTIATE
A LETTER TO MY CHILDREN, GRANDCHILDREN AND GREAT GRANDCHILDREN….
This is a follow up to my earlier letter to you my loved ones. I promised to send you one. I would presume that you have already internalized what I have shared to you last time and this letter would merely situate your gains towards a positive end.
There are, methinks, thousands of books, pamphlets and countless articles on the art of negotiation. Accordingly, it is not only a science, not only an art but a major part in the arsenal of anyone trying to survive and win in any struggle. There are countless approaches, principles, methods too to be employed so that once the person during negotiation applies these tactics, one is already conferred and assured of receiving the better part of the transaction.
I have as yet to make a summary and translate in one swift consideration how these approaches can be applied. But I have devised something that would equate these matters into one simple undertaking.
Let me take you to our previous lesson on winning. Remember the process of defeating and defying time? That you must try to get up before a designated period, that is, as soon as the time you have promised to awaken will have sounded out. I said you have won and that you are already a WINNER. Now, let me continue from there. As you go out to greet the world there will be people who would pounce on you for something. It could be some complicated requests or a plain question on what time is there on your watch.
Now listen up. If there is a person or a group of persons who would approach you with a query, never respond at all. Lest you might misunderstand me, I am not suggesting that you ignore or disregard the fellow but you should take note of what he said (and retort later) but as a rule, you should not reply first. Make the first move or instantly ask another question. Remember, it is always you who must initiate the first question if you could not dismiss the person in front of you. Think of something relevant to displace the first move or question made on you. The trick is for you to get the upper hand. Let him respond first to you before you react on that which the fellow wanted you to do.
You will be amazed that the fellow has immediately been charmed. Anything you ask or require him to do will be done for you. He will do the bidding for you because he is under your spell already.
If you are in a meeting, in a discussion, in a conference or may be in a transaction, remember to ask the first question. Anyone whom you wish to submit to your presence should be the person you will ask first. Any question will do. You may ask how his day or his date, anything innocent. Once he responds, you have him tucked under your control. Even if in the course of your activity he piles up a lot of questions on you, in the end, he will always defer to your side or in anything where you are positioned.
You are familiar in a classroom setting. Once the teacher comes in and declares a greeting, everybody responds. From there on, all of those in the classroom are subservient to his requirements already. Try to greet the teacher first before he commence and start to check your attendance, chances are he will dismiss the class early, and most likely you would hear complaints from him that he got out of bed on the wrong side. Worst, he will never find the proper bearing to teach if that happens.
Now, let me repeat for purposes of emphasis. If you want to dominate without being dominant, manipulative without being oppressive, to take a lead without being overbearing; you just want to express simple command, be respected in your ideas, in other words, succeed in the negotiation table whether it is conducted in a board room or under the tree, then don’t ever forget to ask the FIRST QUESTION, whatever it is.
Take good care always and share this also to your loved ones.
Posted on September 17, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged current-events, facial expression, PHILOSOPHY, politics, public perception, religion, society, travel, vacation. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.